Monday, October 23, 2017

First day in a park

Rattle struggles
I have been thinking about different things that I can do to make sure my baby gets all the help he needs and all the support I can summon. Trying to come up with creative and fun ways to get some exercises started while we wait for his early intervention to start (evaluation happening soon). That being said, he is not even three months old so all he really wants to do right now is eat, sleep and repeat (with pooping in between of course). But as he is getting older, he stays up for longer and I am bored of just the play mat or the music mobile or trying to get him to hold a rattle constantly worrying he might throw it on his face.

Waiting patiently to be taken to the park

One such afternoon, it was nice and sunny outside while Laksh and I were sitting inside trying to find activities to do. We rocked some tummy time, spend time kicking the key board on his fisher price play mat and also tried playing with the rattle for a bit. We were also done with his body massage and bath time. Now, I had him on a boppy and was playing some Mozart lullaby for him trying to get him to sleep. Suddenly, I realized we could go to the park. Not sure what we would do there because he isn't old enough to sit on the swings yet. I quickly got him all bundled up and strapped in the stroller while willing him to stay up. He kept looking around trying to figure out what in hell's name is happening suddenly. Why is my mom running around like a headless chicken frantically trying to get my diaper bag ready for this last minute excursion. As a new mom, the only thing I don't carry on trips is his crib. I know I know,  by the time we have a second baby I would be a pro and might just leave with a spare diaper tucked into my jeans but for now its going to be this way.

Once he was all secure in the seat, we breezed out and practically ran to the park which is just a couple of blocks from our apartment. All the while I am talking to him trying to keep him interested enough to stay awake. As we make our way to the park, I notice his eyelids getting heavier and his blinking getting longer, as in the 'eyes closed' part of the blink kept getting longer and longer. By the time, we made our grand entry to the park of course he had fallen asleep. His aunt and I looked at each other and wondered now what? Well, we got some nice 'Vitamin D time' for him while the two of us, video called all of our family members showing them how he is rocking his first day in the park. We exchanged smiles with other parents whose children we actually playing in the park. At some point, I thought if only there was a nice patch of thick green grass, we could get him down on the blanket and let him relax in some fresh air. But as you can see, in this concrete jungle, most of the parks follow a similar theme.

I sat there contemplating his future (like I find myself doing more often these days) and scared of the unknown. Thinking of other parents who have raised a child with down syndrome before us and of parents yet to come. Thinking of not so good things that doctors and other people have told me. I remember one OBGYN telling me, some kids with down syndrome are able to read, walk, talk and be some what independent these days. One parent with a 26 year old told me how her child can read at grade 4 level and I thought to myself, this is not okay. I want my baby to be able to do everything in life to the fullest and not be okay with these limitations society and medical professionals are keen on implementing on them. Every day, I see others kids doing so well with inclusion  (thanks to I am aware of this fact) and keep thinking when Laksh would start school, will we be able to find such a school or will I be able to convince the school to become inclusive and help mold a more productive environment for learning. I am his advocate and I want to create a world full of opportunities for him and not hurdles.

Anyway, after sitting there for some more time, I pushed all these thoughts to the back into the 'dwell on later' part of my brain. We decided to walk around to get some exercise for ourselves, while he continues to nap. As we started walking and making our way out of the park, he starts to stir. Little did I know, the only way to get him up is to physically be outside the park. Once we were safely outside the park, my little one wakes up giving me the stink eye.

It has been a while now since we left for our mini adventure so we continue making our way back to our apartment. When we reach home, and I remove him from the stroller I realize the stink was not limited to just his eye but also his tushy. Yes, my precious baby made history in his debut trip to the park. He did not do anything kids usually do in the park and it seemed like he preferred being any where but the park. The only thing he did in the park is sleep. He did his own thing. I know this may not be a big deal but in doing so, he made his realize that he is going to create his own path and it is okay. Everything is going to be just fine. He teaches me how to enjoy the small things and live in the moment.

Leaving you guys with this beautiful quote I read online.

The moment a child is born,
the mother is also born.
She never existed before.
The woman existed, but the mother, never.
A mother is something absolutely new.


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